10 Ways Capitalism is F-ing Your Sex Life
Most of us probably don’t spend much time thinking about how capitalism affects our sex lives—but it’s a sneaky saboteur! In a world that values profits over people, it’s no surprise that the pressures of capitalism seep into every corner of our lives, including the bedroom. Let’s break down ten ways capitalism is messing with moms’ sexual health and wellness.
1. Inaccessible Healthcare
Ever tried navigating the maze that is healthcare? Between the sky-high costs and insurance nightmares, accessing sexual health services can feel impossible. Specialists who are trained to help, like pelvic floor therapists or sexual medicine providers, often don’t even take insurance and those that do have long waiting lists and have to adhere to insurance companies bureaucratic bullshit (which often decreases the quality of care). This leaves many moms either not getting care, paying out-of-pocket (which isn’t always doable), or getting lackluster care. When healthcare is so hard to access, it’s no wonder sexual health takes a hit.
2. Workplace Stress
Long hours, insultingly low wages, and never-ending to-do lists—sound familiar? By the time you’ve juggled work, kids, and housework, who has energy left for intimacy? The stress of keeping up with the demands of capitalism can lower libido and make sex feel like just another task on your already overloaded plate. Chronic stress? That’s even worse—it messes with your hormones and can suppress your desire altogether.
3. Childcare Costs
Childcare is so expensive that it forces many families to make tough choices. Some moms stay home, giving up income (and reinforcing old-school gender roles), while others work multiple jobs just to cover the cost. Either way, the exhaustion from juggling it all means less time and energy for connection with your partner. When you’re drained, intimacy is often the first thing to go.
4. Limited Maternity Leave
Maternity leave in many places is a joke. In the U.S., one in four people return to work just TWO WEEKS after giving birth. Two weeks! How are you supposed to recover, bond with your baby, and even think about sex when you’re back at work so soon? The lack of adequate maternity leave leaves moms physically and emotionally drained, making it nearly impossible to focus on sexual wellness.
5. Unrealistic Beauty Standards
BOUNCE BACK CULTURE IS BULLSHIT! Capitalism (and its bff, patriarchy) loves to tell us our worth is tied to our looks, pushing moms to feel like they need to snap back to their pre-baby bodies to feel worthy. Social media is flooded with images of “perfect” moms who seem to have it all together, but it’s all smoke and mirrors (in 18 years of Mothering and 12 years of supporting mothers professionally, I have yet to meet a single mother who has it all together). This pressure not only affects our self-esteem but also our desire. When you’re busy worrying about how you look, it’s hard to relax and enjoy intimacy. Research shows body image has an impact on sexual satisfaction, with a positive body image leading to greater satisfaction and vice versa.
6. Barriers to Mental Health Services
Mental health support? Good luck. Between the costs, lack of coverage, and limited time off work, getting help can feel impossible. Anxiety and depression, which many moms experience, can seriously dampen your sex life. When untreated, these mental health issues create emotional distance, making it harder to connect with your partner both physically and emotionally.
7. Burnout and Overwork
The hustle culture is real, and it’s brutal. Burnout from constantly being “on” leaves little room for self-care or intimacy. When you’re running on empty, it’s hard to find joy in anything, let alone sex.
8. Reinforced Traditional Gender Roles
Capitalism keeps outdated gender roles alive and well. Moms are expected to handle the bulk of domestic duties, often at the expense of their careers and personal well-being. This imbalance can lead to resentment and fatigue—two major libido killers. Studies show that couples who share chores equally have better sex lives, but capitalism isn’t set up to make that easy.
9. The Mental Load
Managing the household, kids, schedules, and all the little details—sound familiar? The mental load of motherhood is real, and it’s exhausting. When your brain is constantly running a million miles a minute, finding time to unwind and get in the mood is tough.
10. Devaluing Motherhood
In a capitalist society, motherhood is often seen as less valuable unless it’s tied to economic productivity. This devaluation can make moms feel invisible or unappreciated, leading to low self-esteem and a lack of interest in sex. When your worth isn’t recognized, it’s hard to feel empowered in any area of life, including the bedroom.
It is obvious capitalism has a chokehold on our lives, and it’s squeezing the joy out of EVERYTHING, including our sex lives While we might be stuck living in this system, we don’t have to let it define us. By learning about and understanding the forces that oppress mothers, we can start to fight back. Educate yourself, challenge the norms, and make your well-being a priority. True sexual liberation for mothers begins with recognizing these pressures and taking steps to reclaim your power, your pleasure, and your life.
Dawn Moore is the founder of maternal sexual health platform, ‘Mama Comes First’. She is also a Women’s Health & Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner, Certified Sex Educator, Midwife, and Mom of 4.
